Tips for Mustard Day

Saturday is the day and here’s what you need to know if you’re coming to Middleton for our 26th annual National Mustard Day celebration. These are our Top Ten Tips for Mustard Day 2016:

• (1) Give yourself time to find parking. You may have to walk a bit but we recommend Terrace Avenue or High Point Road. Or wherever you can find.
• (2) The POUPON U Accordion Band goes on at 9:30. The Duchess (who plays the accordion and yodels) will be around all day and you will definitely want to get a picture with her.
• (3) Stormin’ Gorman Thomas will be signing jars of his new Carolina-style mustard sauce. If you want him to sign something else, please also buy some of his great sauce. It’s not fair to Gorman or the Mustard Museum to ask him to sign something else and not buy his sauce.
• (4) Meathead Goldwyn will be signing his new book but supplies are limited. He will be speaking at 11:30 and 2:00.
• (5) You have to try this year’s frozen mustard custard flavor from Culver’s: Chocolate Cherry Mustard. It is the best they’ve ever done and we predict it will become a regular flavor for them.
• (6) We’ll have plenty of drinks for sale — water, lemonade, soft drinks. Stay hydrated!



• (7) Do not attempt to bring ketchup to the festival; bottles of the evil red stuff will be confiscated and sent to the state’s toxic waste disposal site. If you or your poorly trained children must have ketchup on your hot dog or bratwurst (and that it pure evil), we will have it under the table for a $10 charge (a sin tax); proceeds go to the nonprofit Mustard Museum.
• (8) Support the nearby local businesses. They will be open on Mustard Day and look forward to seeing you.
• (9) Do not pet the Curator. On second thought – petting the Curator would be a friendly gesture and he will be very happy if you do.
• (10) Support America’s favorite condiment museum with your purchases, participation in the games, and generous donations.

If you can’t make it to Middleton, raise a jar of mustard at noon and point it toward us. We recommend a hot mustard so we can “feel the burn.”

Listen to the Curator’s interview with WGN’s Nick Digilio: http://wgnradio.com/2016/08/02/national-mustard-day-is-this-saturday/

If you Google “National Mustard Day,” it sometimes comes up as being on Friday, August 5. No! It’s Saturday, August 6. National Mustard Day is always the first Saturday in August. Google has obviously been hacked by the Ketchup Kartel.